"Never love a wild thing … you can’t give your heart to a wild thing; the more you do, the stronger they get. Until they’re strong enough to run into the woods. Or fly into a tree. Then a taller tree. Then the sky. that's how you'll end up if you let yourself love a wild thing. you will end up looking at the sky"

That's my favorite book quotes that stuck in my head for a long time from Truman Capote book, Breakfast at tiffany's. We, human always love people with wild or broken personality, we try so hard to fix them. It is not inherently wrong to love "wild" things or broken people and want to help or support them. Love and compassion are powerful forces that can inspire positive change and growth. But it's also important to recognize that not everything in life can be fixed or repaired, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. While it's natural to feel empathy and compassion for someone or something that is broken, it's crucial to understand that you cannot solely bear the responsibility for fixing everything.

When it comes to matters of love, it's important to remember that individuals are complex and have their own journeys to navigate. It's not healthy or fair to enter a relationship with the sole purpose of fixing someone or expecting them to fix you. Relationships should be based on mutual support, growth, and love.

It's important to prioritize your own well-being and emotional health. Loving someone who is broken can be emotionally draining and can hinder your own personal growth. It's essential to establish healthy boundaries and recognize when it's necessary to step back and take care of yourself.

It's important also to accept that not everything can be fixed or changed. Understand that some things are beyond your control, and it's essential to manage your own expectations accordingly. Acceptance doesn't mean giving up on someone, but rather recognizing that everyone has their own journey and pace of healing.

Sometimes, the most compassionate thing you can do is to provide support, understanding, and encouragement while also encouraging the person to seek professional help or resources to address their own healing process. Remember that you cannot control or fix another person's journey, and it's essential to respect their autonomy and allow them the space to heal at their own pace.

Ultimately, it's important to surround yourself with healthy and positive relationships that contribute to your own happiness and well-being. You deserve love and support just as much as anyone else, and it's important to choose relationships that are built on a foundation of mutual respect, understanding, and growth.

Love,

Naaj

Saya tuh belajar banyak selama 3 tahun ke belakang ini dan banyak kehilangan orang-orang terdekat saya. Yang paling memukul adalah kehilangan ibu dan kakak saya juga kucing peliharaan saya karena waktu mereka di dunia sudah habis dan sudah waktunya kembali menuju Tuhan dengan damai. 

Kehilangan kawan-kawan dekat pun juga saya alami. Dan akhirnya saya sibuk mencari kambing hitam untuk disalahkan selama 3 tahun terakhir. karena menurut saya sepertinya kehilangan yang saya alami memang dari faktor luar. Lama-lama lelah juga karena setiap kali saya mencari, saat itu pula saya makin jauh dari jawaban yang saya cari.

Saya ingat beberapa waktu lalu saya sedang duduk di balkon apartemen lantai 11 sambil menyesap kopi di pagi hari, memperhatikan jalanan dan jari jemari saya memegang erat rokok yang sesekali saya hisap juga hembuskan. Saat itu suara dari dalam diri saya bilang 

"eh, kadang segala sesuatu yang terjadi ga perlu dicari penyebabnya, diterima saja dan jalani. Manusia memang datang dan pergi, kamu kan tau itu sejak dulu. Semua orang mengalami kok."

sambil memperhatikan jalanan kota Jakarta yang sibuk, saya kemudian berpikir, betul juga, mereka yang ada di dalam kendaraan melaju cepat itupun juga pasti pernah meraskan kehilangan. Dan juga mungkin sebagian dari mereka sudah belajar bahwa segala kehilangan yang terjadi kadang ga perlu dicari jawabannya atau penyebabnya, karena hanya akan menghabiskan energi dan tenaga. Cukup diterima dan jalani. Ketika itu saya sadar terlalu fokus untuk mencari sebab dan menyalahkan orang lain atas kehilangan yang saya alami, akhirnya? stress dan depresi, engga fokus dengan masa kini, malah fokusnya ke masa lalu.

tentang kehilangan, saya pikir sangat wajar untuk kita, manusia mengalami kehilangan. Karena manusia datang silih berganti, ibarat kata semua manusia adalah pengembara termasuk kita sendiri. 

People come and go in our lives, leaving their mark in one way or another. Some are here to stay, while others are only passing through. It's a natural part of life, and it can be both beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time.

When someone comes into our life, they bring with them a unique set of experiences, perspectives, and qualities that enrich our own lives. We learn from them, laugh with them, and grow with them. But inevitably, some of these people will leave our lives, either by choice or circumstance.

When someone leaves, it can feel like a piece of us is missing. We may feel sadness, confusion, and even anger. But it's important to remember that every person who comes into our life is there for a reason. They may have fulfilled their purpose, taught us a lesson, or simply helped us through a difficult time.

It's also important to recognize that just because someone leaves, it doesn't mean they are gone forever. We may cross paths again in the future, or we may continue to hold them in our hearts as cherished memories.

Ultimately, the ebb and flow of people in our lives is a reminder to cherish every moment we have with those we love. We should never take anyone for granted, because we never know how long they will be with us.

So, to all the people who have come and gone in my lives, I thank you. Thank you for the joy, the laughter, the tears, and the memories. You have left your mark on me, and I am forever grateful.

Regards,

Naaj

I think romanticizing your life can’t be considered a bad thing or an unhealthy thing if you are keeping your feet on your ground. By adding a touch of romance to your life, you can elevate your mood, improve your relationships & cultivate a deeper appreciation for all that life has to offer

for me, romanticizing your life is about finding beauty in the everyday moments. It's about taking time to appreciate the way the sunlight filters through the trees, the sound of birds singing in the morning, or the taste of a perfectly brewed cup of coffee or other simple things.

I also learn something that when I started to romanticize my life then I become more focusing on the good things in my life, I can cultivate a sense of appreciation and contentment. Take time each day to reflect on the things I am grateful for, whether it's the people in my life, the beauty of nature or the simple pleasures that bring me a joy.

by embracing your inner romantic inner, you can infuse your life with a sense of wonder and magic. So please take some time today to slow down and appreciate the beauty around you, and savor the simple pleasure of life.

Regards,

Naajmi

I saw you in my dreams before, you were there sitting at edge of curved window, admiring the moon. I can see your soul through your teary eyes under the moonlight.

There was a deep hollow in your heart you tried to continuously fill it with something that makes you feel better, but unfortunately it’s not enough to make you feel better.

my selenophile,
In moments like this
I want to sit beside you
place your hand in mine
and tell you all that I have learned about you;

 “The more peace we bring into our lives, the more peace we bring into this world.”

― Todd Perelmuter

Living a peaceful life is something that many of us aspire to achieve. However, it can be challenging to know where to start or what changes to make to create a peaceful life. In this blog, I want to share my experience of living a peaceful life and the changes I made to achieve it.

Firstly, I realized that peace is an inside job. It's not something that we can find outside of ourselves, but rather it's something that we cultivate within. I started by prioritizing self-care and making time for activities that bring me joy and relaxation. I made a conscious effort to take care of my physical health by eating well, exercising regularly, and getting enough sleep.

going back to Bandung also one  of my fav thing to make myself more peaceful

Secondly, I started practicing mindfulness regularly. I found that mindfulness helped me to stay present in the moment and reduced my stress levels. I started with simple practices like taking a few deep breaths throughout the day and gradually moved onto more formal practices like meditation and yoga. Mindfulness helped me to focus on the present moment and let go of worries about the past or the future.

Next, I simplified my life by decluttering my home, simplifying my schedule, and letting go of commitments that no longer served me. Simplifying my life helped me to reduce my stress levels and create a more peaceful environment. I found that having fewer possessions and commitments helped me to focus on what was truly important and let go of distractions.

I also made an effort to foster positive relationships in my life. I surrounded myself with people who brought out the best in me and supported my goals and values. I let go of relationships that were negative or draining and focused on building connections with people who added value to my life.

Finally, I found purpose and meaning in my life by pursuing hobbies (scrapbook) and interests that brought me joy, volunteering in my community, and finding work that aligned with my values. Having a sense of purpose and meaning in my life helped me to create a sense of peace and fulfillment. I also take a break from social media often.

In conclusion, living a peaceful life is about cultivating a sense of peace within ourselves. By prioritizing self-care, practicing mindfulness, simplifying our lives, fostering positive relationships, and finding purpose and meaning in our lives, we can create a more peaceful and fulfilling life. It's important to remember that creating a peaceful life is a journey, and it takes time and effort to achieve. However, the benefits of a peaceful life are well worth it, and I encourage everyone to start the journey towards a more peaceful life.

Regards,

Naajmi

Karena pernikahan tidaklah seindah dongeng.

Di pikiran saya terbersit banyak hal yang indah, dan perasaan "akhirnya dinikahin juga" karena sejujurnya faktor iri pada kawan-kawan yang sudah nikah duluan juga menjadi salah satu faktor saya pengen banget nikahnya cepat.

justru kami dihadapkan oleh berbagai macam issues; mulai dari masalah finansial yang belum stabil, emosi kami yang masih turun naik, sampai titik dimana there were suddenly a million things I wanted to change about him. Yang tadinya pas pacaran tidak keliatan: the way he made empty promises to do chores, posisi tidur yang ajaib, cara makannya, the way he dealt with problems etc

Ya saya pikir dengan pacaran kurang lebih satu setengah tahun, saya sudah banyak tahu tentang dia, tapi ternyata tidak. Yang saya ketahui hanya permukaannya saja, sama seperti dia yang hanya tau permukaan saya saja. Entah kenapa ketika pacaran, kita semua terkadang cenderung menunjukkan sifat yang bagus sehingga ada culture shock ketika baru menikah dan mengetahui sifat asli dari pasangan.

My expectations of marriage were drowning me in disappointment. I’d become one of those women who want to “fix” their husbands. It was making both of us miserable. It occurred to me that I was feeling this way because I was scared out of my mind.

Pun dengan perbedaan prinsip yang tiba-tiba muncul, padahal pas pacaran biasa aja, bukan sebuah issue yang besar tapi setelah menikah jadi hal yang sangat besar dan lelah sekali. At some point I had this kind of feeling that this is not what I want. I want a fairytale, then i'm questioning a lot of things that time:

kemana semua kebahagiaan pernikahan yang seperti di dongeng?

kenapa ga ada yg ngasih tau kalo pernikahan itu melelahkan? Kenapa ga ada yang ngasih tau bahwa pernikahan adalah tentang sebuah kerja sama? Kenapa ga ada yg bilang kalo finansial itu penting banget dalam pernikahan bukan malah mendesak untuk nyuruh kita nikah terus bilang “tar juga ada rejekinya”

Pun ternyata pikiran saya salah bahwa menikah bukanlah akhir dari cerita hidup. The thing is, your story doesn’t end when u get married, nor does it begin. It continues just as your life has always continued.

It’s all very sweet and romantic to think about when you are in love with someone. But marriage isn’t about being with someone you're madly in love with because you happen to only see their best traits.

Because for me marriage is about being with a person who is as complex and imperfect as u are, and accepting them for it no matter what. Tapi tetap berusaha untuk menjadi lebih baik hari demi hari nya.

Marriage is not the formula to make everything perfect. Rather, it's a decision to build a life with someone and grow together spiritually. It won't be easy, but it will be interesting. Marriage it’s not about fairy tale. But it’s about trust, communication, loyalty, respect each other and commitment.

Regards,

Naaj Wicaksono